High School Hysterics
by LuminoSpirit
Summary: Oneshot! AU where all superheroes go to the same high school. When Peter woke up this morning, he knew that something was going to happen. Be it due to Parker-luck, destiny, or something else, he didn't know. But he didn't expect this...


**A/N)** _(Don't forgive her. She doesn't deserve it)._

 **Heh heh. Yeah. I'm sorry!**

 **I've kinda been having trouble with a fight scene in the next chapter for 'A trickster's fate'. I don't want anything to seem illogical, or make someone OP, or... y'know... make mistakes. It's hard! The first one was bad enough!**

 **Anyways, I figured I could just send out this oneshot that's been hanging around for a while. It can be viewed as romance, or friendship- your choice. I just kinda felt that I should contribute to the growing amount of Deadpool and Spider-man crossovers.**

 **(Oh, and before we get into the story, I'd just like to tell 'Christina' that I have seen your review, and I would totally love to write a story like that! I, too, have been searching for such a story, and I did find one! It's called** ** _'Great grandpa cap'_** **by youngjusticefanatic, if you're interested. I don't think that it will be over-long, and probably won't be posted any time soon, as I'm kinda hard pressed with school-work and updating, but I** ** _will_** **do it! If there is anything you would like to add, please feel free to tell me!)**

 **Anyway, enjoy!**

 **Peter's POV**

My ears pricked up when I thought I heard something akin to running. I lifted my head, and shifted my glasses a little in order to get a better look. That was when someone zipped past my face, and snatched up my glasses in a grubby palm. Immediately my sight was doused in a permanent blur, and the only other traces of the assailant left was the sound of trainers squeaking on the floor, and muffled snickering.

My un-seeing eyes widened marginally, and I quickly yelled after the aggressor in panic. "Hey, get back here!" In reply, all he recieved was more fading laughter.

I huffed half-heartedly and carded a hand through my unruly hair. It was the begining of the school day, and I knew that I was going to be tardy already. Oh joy.

I sighed and leaned up against my locker with a disappointed scowl on my face. I knew that I should have worn my contact lenses today. I had had a feeling of... trepidation, this morning. I just knew that Parker luck was going to be up to something today, and I had been right. Things had just seemed too perfect. The sun was shining, the birds were chirping, and aunt May had made my favourite blueberry pancakes. Something was bound to go wrong.

Instead of listening to my common sense like I should have, I went out without my contacts on. And now I was here; stranded in the middle of the hall, no one to guide me, (my only friend was the blind Matt Murdock. And an aquaintance of sorts- Harry Osborne. But I doubted that either would help out; Matt was usually in class early, and Harry wasn't really inclined to do anything anyway) and completely susceptible to any and all attacks.

That was when I heard the bell ring it's warning chime. I supposed there wouldn't be many 'attacks' now...

Maybe I would get lucky? Perhaps someone kind would come by- like Steve Rogers, he was always nice. And James Barnes wasn't too bad... But they also only had classes on the other side of school, for some reason. Apparently it was so that they could see each other more often, but I had a feeling it was more because the jocks had claimed this part of school as their own. And Steve and I... we weren't really very fond of jocks. And the jocks weren't really fond of us, either... Steve and I were sort of similar, in that respect.

And then came the class bell. I was already late, and I was probably going to get a good chewing out from my aunt, but I didn't really care about that. What I did care about was that I now had zero glasses, and therefore, zero sight. It wasn't as if our family was well off, either. Not all of us could be Tony Stark, which was kind of sad. He could be rich, a jock, and a nerd- all without getting beat up by bullies! He had to have invented a mechanical genie, or something, 'cause that was just magic.

But I waited it out. I slid down to the floor, and pulled my knees up close to my chest. I didn't want to trouble any stragglers on the way to class; that would just make them mad. Plus, there was no reason that anyone should have to suffer the same fate as me- tardiness. Although my science teacher would probably not mind (I was his star student, after all... we don't count Stark) none of my other teachers would be quite as nice. I doubted that they would be nice to any of the other late students, either.

After a while I began to lose hope that anyone I- at least vaguely -knew would come by. Some time must have gone by, but I couldn't look at my watch, so I couldn't really tell. I'm going to guess that about twenty minutes have passed, though.

I was getting really bored at this point, and you could tell, because I was starting to list off the periodic table in my head. This is when you know, (as a high school student) that you're at least going a little bit insane.

But suddenly, a noise made me look up sharply. It was footsteps.

They were heavy and echoing on the floor, but not heavy like James Barnes' or Flash's. It was more bouncy than that... it was reminiscent of skipping. And something entirely and utterly strange about it, was the noise that accompanied the footsteps. It was something that neither Flash, nor James would do. Humming.

And whistling. Balamory's theme song.

I looked up, and swivelled my head in the direction of the humming/whistling. If I concentrated, I could see a dark shape (which, indeed, appeared to be skipping). The figure stopped as soon as it (although I presumed it was male due to the heavy footsteps, it would be rather rude to assume that. For all I knew, it could be a bulky female) spotted me, and halted the humming.

"Hi!" Came a cheerful voice. Over cheerful, were my first thoughts. Although, by the voice, this person was probably male, the way he had said 'Hi' had sounded vaguely like one of the cheerleaders that I had seen before. I thought her name was... Stacy? Gwen... Stacy?

Anyway, back to the matter at hand. The young male appeared to be hovering right were he had stopped beforehand, without a care in the world. Which was strange, because even the jock-iest of jocks were slightly worried about getting to class on time. He seemed not to mind at all that he was going to get a strike on the register. In fact, from the whistling, I wouldn't be surprised if he was actually enjoying missing class.

"... Uh, hi?" I try to tell the guy. But it came out as more of a soft whisper, and I wasn't quite sure why. I wondered why he stopped to say hello to me. I wasn't all that noticable, was I? "Can I help you?" I asked.

The guy just continued to stare at me for a full minute. A minute of awkwardness, and possibly the longest minute of my life. "... Nnnn-ope!" He said finally, popping the 'P' at the end. I could see his head tilt slightly to the side and he was probably looking at me with a confused look on his face. Why he would be confused is beyond me, but I don't question it. "But!"

And he concluded like that. He didn't walk away, but he did continue to stare at me. I was wondering whether or not that was supposed to be dramatic pause, when he continued. "Are you blind?" He asked, with no shame at all. He said it in such a way that one might imagine that I had missed something completely obvious, that was right in front of my face. Pretty sure I hadn't, though.

I stared right back at him, with what I was sure was a dumb-founded and beyond confused look on my face. "No," I said carefully, not entirely sure how to act around this person. I hadn't met him, or anyone like him before. "... But someone took my glasses." I told him finally. "... I can't see anything."

He looked at me for a while longer, and awkward silence reined supreme in those five minutes that he just looked. It was kind of creepy, that was for sure, but also slightly amusing.

It was no longer amusing when he started walking towards me silently, without warning. It broke me out of the lull I had settled into with the silence. When he was close enough, I could make out what clothes he was wearing, and even a small, goofy grin on his face. His hood was up. "Well," He said. "That just won't do! You're prince charming will just have to come to the rescue!" He proclaimed, almost like an excited child at Disney land.

I spluttered when he said the words 'Prince charming' and kind of died a little on the inside. Really? ...What did that make me...? "'Prince Charming'...?" I choked out, looking at him in shock.

"Yup!" He said happily, smiling, until he saw my expression, I guess. "...Unless..." He mumbled, and even I could see the smile wiped right off his face. "You don't like that...?" He asked, unsurely, like a lost child.

I had been about to say that no, I did not appreciate being his 'damsel in distress'. Then I saw the look in his eyes, and I just... I couldn't just let him be unhappy like that. "No... no, that's fine..." I mumbled unsurely. Immediately the life was pumped right back into him, and he bounced up with joy.

"Alright!" He bellowed into the hall, and I wondered if he wasn't disturbing anyone with how loud he was. Surely someone had heard that, right? "Let's go!" He exclaimed, and grabbed my hand.

His own hand was rough and calloused. It had strange bumps carved all over it, and I couldn't help but be a bit worried about it. Hands weren't supposed to feel like that... but when I looked up into his face, with his bouncy grin, I realized I didn't want to ruin his mood, so I let it slide. "Where to, sir?" he asked happily.

"Uh..." And I wonder, yes, where to? We couldn't very well go into class over twenty minutes late, (maybe even half an hour, for all I knew) and if this was the case, then class was a little over half way done, anyway. Perhaps I should go to the outside of my next class? Yes, that would be good.

Although... Matt wouldn't be in my next class, so I would probably be stranded in that class-room. But then, maybe the teacher could help out? Nah. History was next, and that teacher was a right old pain. He would just tell me to 'Man-up' and ignore me.

What about the office? Maybe I could get a day off school, because of my glasses? Nope. That probably wouldn't work either. There was undoubtably going to be mishaps there too. For one, how would I get home? I couldn't walk the city streets practically blind (how did Matt do it?) and I couldn't very well ask aunt May to come over from work. It was ages away, plus, we needed the money.

I decided, in the end, that going to history would probably work best. I could wait outside the class-room, and then feel my way in from there. Piece of cake. Right?

 **.o0|O|0o.**

Wrong. When I tried, I bumped into four people, five chairs, two desks, and the floor (don't ask). I did make it to my desk eventually, though! And after that (to celebrate) I listened to the boring drone of the history teacher. I didn't write notes, or anything. I just listened, so I was probably going to fail that history test coming up.

But at the end of the lesson, boy was I surprised when a familiar bumpy hand came to help me out. He just grinned silently at me, (I could tell because he was so close) and helped me put my books into my bag. He even helped me to my next classes, and to the cafeteria (where Matt and I had a very rousing discussion about how the school should invest in walking sticks). He came every lesson, without fail. It was kind of embarrasing (especially when someone yelled 'No homo!').

But when my last class came, I never imagined that he would even walk me home. Aunt May looked surprised, but she didn't comment on it until he was gone.

"Well, he certainly is a character, isn't he?"

I couldn't agree more, aunt May.

"So, when's he staying for dinner? I have to get to know your new boyfriend!"

Head desk.

 **Yep, pretty short, but better this than nothing, right? Right. Right?**


End file.
